What is the everyday??

Around three years ago I was making plans to start a YouTube channel, a blog, photography education, working on becoming a content creator. I was deep deep into my fall wedding season edits and trying to throw the best Christmas ever. I made plans for the finishing renovating the outside of my house that I had been working on for the last two years and I was planning out my next wedding season…life felt hopeful. I found out on March 1st 2023 that my husband at the time was cheating on me. We had been married for 17 years at that point, getting married when I was 21 and in college, and it was the biggest shocker to my entire life. I can replay the time I found out over and over again…it’s vivid in my my unfortunately and I’m still doing my best to forget.

For the next three days my body went into shock and I couldn’t stop shaking. The world I had built in my head with my husband of 17 years and the home and life we (I) hoped to have was crashing in front of me. What do you mean the person I planned on dying next to is cheating on me? What do you mean the man that I have followed all around the country for 17 years for his job and then when he decided he didn’t want that career anymore I employed him and his friends? What do you mean the person who has pretended to adore me, be obsessed and love me for half my life has now done the biggest betrayal I can imagine?

For the next few months I navigated these new waters as carefully and cautiously as I possibly could. I wanted to make the most perfect decisions, I wanted to be a perfect wife trying to work on my marriage. I didn’t want to run away, I wanted to work on this relationship that I had been a part of nearly half my life and with my two children. There’s a long story as to why I’m very against divorce and maybe/hopefully I’ll open more about that but just know that I am and still am against divorce. After trying to work on our marriage for a year there was still infidelity and I have come to terms that this marriage was not going to work. No matter what I did, it wasn’t going to work.

Why am I even talking about this online? Why am I telling anyone? I am writing about this? Why in the world would I share my personal information online?

I’m sharing it because in the time I tried to privately handle the divorce and infidelity and just a few people noticed here and there. I ended up sharing a little bit of my story and I saw that it was able to encourage other women in bad relationships that they are allowed to leave, you don’t have to take abuse, infidelity, etc. I have had friends who have been able to leave narcissistic abusive marriages I never thought they’d be able to leave. I realized that the very little that I was sharing online and the small things I did share somehow was helping these women. I remember when I was going through the depths of my depression and trying to look for answers I wish that I could find real women going through similar things that I did. I wanted to see how did they overcome it? How did they make it through? My reality was torn down and I was trying to reconstruct a life in my head that was not anywhere. near what I planned for myself.

So that’s my real motivator, I was to be there and be the helpful soft place to land. I have always felt like a helper and a teacher. If I’m able to help just a few women make it through some dark times and come out the other side doing okay (ish) I will feel like I have succeeded.

The goal is not to bash my ex or talking about him much at all but to sure the heartbreak and the pain of what I have personally gone through so I can help those going through the same thing. I want to be clear this isn’t a bash your ex serious or posts! This is all about empowering those going through betrayal and grief who don’t want to feel alone.

OKAY AND ALSO….I love DIY’s, cooking, designing, painting, etc. I want to share all the things! Back in the day (2010-2014) I ran a blog and a small handmade business designing hair accessories and jewelry. I remember this was also when instagram was first a thing and Facebook was maybe thriving? This lead me to my love for photography…all things I will continue to talk about on this blog/site. For now, I want you to know that I plan on sharing my healing journey, how I lost 190 pounds, remodeling and DIYs, recipes, lifestyle content and so much more. I have a huge heart for teaching and I have been writing an education course through out this last year. I have SO much that I want to share and I will be doing that you tube channel like I originally planned.

I’m getting close to 2026 here and I have to do the things that have been on my heart, I cannot keep them locked up or hidden away. I have SO much that I want to do beyond being a wedding photographer and I cannot wait to share. Don’t worry, if you came here because you love weddings or photography…there will be a LOT of that…it is my actual life after all.

So, if you want to follow along and grow with me…learn along side and maybe see some cute projects and receipes….I’ll be so happy to have you.

Love,

Erin

P.S. To live is the rarest thing in the world. - Oscar Wild